Random Acts of Reality is a Blog written by one who works with the London Ambulance Service. In his introduction the writer tells us that his Blog was previously known as "Why I Hate Humanity" but the anti psychotic medication seems to have kicked in.
I'm not so sure. In his latest posting he complains:
"It's tiring sometimes, the grind of going to people who aren't really ill all day, every day.
"I have dark and horrible thoughts sometimes. If it rains after a period of heat I know that the roads are going to be slippery - perhaps there will be a car crash? It's a Friday night - maybe someone will get stabbed? The security level is critical - maybe someone will do something more scary than burn a jeep?
"It worries me that I think like this, it worries me that I'm happy when people injure themselves. I know I'm not alone, I know that the other services also like a good 'shout', but it still seems wrong to want people hurt so I can test myself, so I can have an 'interesting' day.
. . . . .
"I am not mad.
And in conclusion: "Right now I'm thinking about an idea for a TV series - an ambulance worker who sets up increasingly bizarre 'accidents' in order to sate his desire to actually use the skills that he has."
One of the first comments he receives has contemporary relevance.
"...and aren't we hearing that some of the people connected with the London car bombs are doctors? Fanatical terrorists, or just really, REALLY bored ? - the mind boggles!"
My mind boggles too. Here is someone, upon whom in an emergency I may depend for my life, sharing the darker side of his own mind. The richer the imagination, the blacker and crazier may be the thoughts. But it's one thing to confide them to friends or weave them into a fictional narrative, another to broadcast them as a working professional on the internet. Keeping things to oneself is not now fashionable, but exercising proper self-control in a public forum can sometimes be the responsible thing to do.